Why do people feel the need to ask this question? Ever since Anna was born, I have been getting asked, "So, are you done?" in that knowing tone of voice that implies that of course we must be done since we have our requisite two children. The shock and horror in the asker's expression and tone when I say that we are not done is quite comical to watch.
Yes, my pregnancy with Anna sucked. Pelvic rotations are not fun. Puking daily for almost 20 weeks is not fun. Hardly being able to walk and being extremely swollen was not fun either. So maybe next time I'll just go to Babies'R'Us to buy a baby. Rachel used to think that's where babies come from - now she knows that they grow in a mommy's uterus. Of course, she's convinced that only mommies have a uterus and that she most certainly does not.
Back to my rant... why is it considered such an outlandish thing to have - *gasp* - more than two children!?!?? I have had people tell me that children are expensive. Yes and no. They don't have to be. Besides, anyone who knows me or has gone shopping with me knows that I'm pretty good at bargain hunting for the kids' clothes and toys. My poor mother gets shot down for wanting to pay full price for things for the kids if she's silly enough to tell me about it! (Not that I'm looking a gift horse in the mouth. And I'm certainly not suggesting that my mother is related to anything remotely equine either!)
I think one of the stupidest things I have been told about children's costs was by a member of the orchestra here in town. This was several years ago when Rachel was about 6 months old and we were talking about trying for another one. "Oh, you don't want more than 2 children. Children are expensive! And don't you want them to have things like music lessons? Music lessons are expensive. I have one family with 4 children and it's quite a struggle for them to afford it all." *Jane's jaw drops open* What I *thought* was, "I offer discounts to families with multiple children. Heck, I once taught a student for free all year long in exchange for something that turned out to be worth nothing. I regularly extend students' lesson times if I know that it's a stretch for them to pay for the extra time." I have no clue what I actually said, but I was shocked at the comments. Besides, if we couldn't afford it, we could certainly teach our children ourselves. That is, if I'm coherent enough to remember which hand holds the violin and which hand holds the bow!
And yes, we have chosen to not send our children to public school. Preschool isn't that expensive, and if we choose to send them to a private school, we'll obviously only do it if we're in a financial position to do so. Homeschooling isn't off the table yet either. I know, I'm shockingly not mainstream about so many things.
Seriously though, when did it become such a cultural oddity to want more than two children? We like to tell people that we want 17, because it's clearly unlikely given my age and difficulty conceiving, so people don't tend to push us. Honestly, we might be done. Or we might not.
#1 - Great pregnancy, crappy delivery
#2 - Crappy pregnancy, great delivery
I did say that if my delivery with #2 was awful, that we'd likely not try for another. Since the delivery was awesome, you'll have to wait and see. I've been told that I need to wait a year in order to let my body heal from the pelvic rotation. That's fine with me.
And no, we won't try for a third because we want to get a boy. That's just silly. Mind you, if we were observant Orthodox Jews it wouldn't be so silly because they interpret the command to be fruitful and multiply as needing to have both a boy and a girl. Or so I've read...
Ben would be happy with a whole house full of girls. He says that girls' softball is better anyway, not that we've been able to convince Rachel to try any sports yet! But it's not like we'd leave a baby boy on a mountaintop somewhere. We'd just have him circumsized and thus open up a whole 'nother can of worms.
I wonder how many more "hot-button" topics I can get into one blog post. This is really a fun way to avoid sorting and packing!