R.I.P. Broil King

I have a bit of the sixth sense. It's never been complete enough to let me in on what exactly will happen next, but I almost always have an accurate sense of foreboding.

The other day, Rachel and I were in the kosher grocery store. While we try to buy only kosher meat, I will admit that occasionally I buy non-kosher beef because the kosher selection is usually abysmal and the prices are often over-inflated. (This is in total contrast to kosher chicken which can be obtained at Costco of all places!) That day, I noted that the kosher beef section was rather full. I thought that perhaps I should pick up some hamburger meat or some steaks. Then I thought for no rational reason, "You know, I don't think it's going to be a great week for Ben to barbecue." I wondered at the time why I would think such a thing since we were both going to be home for dinner most nights and clearly it wasn't too cold or snowy to use the grill. In the end, I did not buy any beef.

Two days later, we heard a loud sound outside one morning. We initially thought it was thunder. When we looked outside, we realized that we had purchased a truly intelligent although self-destructive BBQ back in the fall. No chance of this BBQ ever putting itself on fire, because in high winds, it clearly knew how to stop, drop and roll. Yes, you read that correctly. Our BBQ was knocked backwards off of our concrete patio. It went down the (approximately) one foot drop, then rolled over a couple of times on its trip down the hill between our house and the house next door before landing flat on its back as if to say, "Where's the beef?"

Ben retrieved the BBQ but things weren't looking so good. The lid was cracked through, and other parts also appear to be rather mangled. Ben set the BBQ up against the house this time since clearly we weren't going to be using it until further notice. The next day, it flew off again when we weren't looking. Now it is in our garage, awaiting its potentially final fate.

We have a Broil King BBQ, which is a Canadian brand. We loved our previous Broil King, so when we moved down here, we looked for a local retailer that sold the same brand. Little did we know that when faced with the unfamiliar American climate, our BBQ would turn into a kamikaze grill. Thankfully, the propane tank did not burst.

We called the retailer and were told that this most likely would fall under an "act of God" and as such would not be covered by manufacturer's warranty or our insurance. I have a hunch that our deductible is higher than the cost of the BBQ anyway. The retailer did tell us that if it could be repaired, they would sell us the replacement parts at half price. We will take it in next week, but we're prematurely announcing an end to easy last-minute dinners at our house.